How Motherhood Can Make Women Disconnect from their Own Bodies

Every mom wants to live a healthy lifestyle and inspire her kids and partner to adopt those habits too. Yet in reality, achieving that balance can be surprisingly difficult. Even though you can successfully manage your own daily responsibilities and care for your family, you may still feel disconnected from your own needs.

There can be so much physicality involved in being a mom, from pregnancy, to birth, to caring for your kids—and at some point, your body can start feeling less like your own and more like a tool to get everybody else through their day.

Unfortunately, many moms stop checking in with themselves and keeping tabs on their own health and needs. They notice what the body can still do, sure, but not always how it actually feels. After more time passes, that disconnect can grow without you even realizing it—and it can continue, despite what stage of life you’re in.

You Were in Survival Mode for Way too Long

Over time, the effects of neglecting yourself can start to add up. Important mom self-care habits—like maintaining your physical fitness and getting enough sleep—can easily fall by the wayside. Even appointments may get skipped, such as seeing a gynecologist, getting regular women’s health screenings, or seeing a doctor for any health issues. 

Even Body Changes Can Feel Hard to Process

Your own body image can also affect your daily life and how you feel. Motherhood can change the way your body looks and feels in both subtle and obvious ways. For instance, you might discover a few stretch marks, experience some soreness or put on extra weight. This is all very common—a body can feel different to you during motherhood, even when nobody else seems to notice.

Caring for Everyone Else Makes Self-Care Feel Optional

On top of falling into a care-giving role for their kids and partner, moms may find themselves having to take care of aging parents as well. In fact, more than 1 in 4 moms are in the “sandwich generation,” in which they find themselves not only caring for their own families, but having to look after their aging parents as well.

What You Can Do

Even with all those mom duties, it’s still possible to stay on top of everything while making time to care for yourself, too. Check out these simple yet effective tips to help you balance your responsibilities and prioritize your own well-being.

1. Reserve a few moments for yourself daily. Even if it’s only 10 minutes a day, every little bit helps! For example, you could set aside a little time to call a friend, listen to a podcast or enjoy a cup of tea.
2. Get active. Enjoy some physical activity every day, whether it’s enjoying a quiet solo walk, going bike riding with the kids or playing a game of fetch with your dog.
3. Connect with friends. Make an effort to stay connect with your friends, such as by having a moms night out or connecting with your besties via Zoom.
4. Pay attention to what you eat. Even if you can’t eat the healthiest meals all the time, try to work in some good-for-you options, such as by making a big salad, such as one topped with a healthy protein like chicken breast, for your family dinner every now and then.
5. Keep up with your medical appointments. See your doctor regularly, including for your yearly physical and recommended health screenings.
6. Get enough sleep. While it’s tempting to stay up late to squeeze in some me-time after the kids go to bed, try not to stay up too late, so you can get the sleep you need.